just an ol' broad & her Pitbull sitting right where the couch is located.
just here for fun hashtags; keep your personal politics secret.
Joined on 11 April, 2018
my souffle fell, just like my expectations
buy everyone's Christmas gift from $1.00 Store, only to find out everyone already owned one.
my hair has a great day, even when my attitude doesn't.
the pot at the end of the rainbow is my toilet.
I'm dating a Handyman instead of a Lawyer.
I get a stiff Irish Coffee instead of Starbucks anything.
Yogi Bear refers to his girlfriend as "Boo Boo."
How do you know?
Mighty Mouse "comes to save the day!"
the pizza comes with that white plastic little table in the middle
i have the perfect alcohol level to win all pool games.
not drunk enough, can't calculate angles,
too drunk & I'm hitting balls, flying off the table.
The Pool Shark Sweet Spot
the whites of my eggs are cooked but the yolks are still runny, & the buttered toast is still warm.
it's all very scientific
I get the hamburger that didn't hit the floor first.
I choose Rock, you choose Scissors, & I win by smashing your scissors, your fingers & hand & your self-confidence.
they know nobody ever reads the legal clauses.
NOT Black Friday.
NOT Cyber Monday.
Yes, Regretful Tuesday & Return Thursday.
everytime a demon gets his barbed tail.
& I smile whenever that tail gets stuck inside my front door keyhole.
"Hello, electric toaster. "
when my dog sees a cute dog video & starts humping all the phone chargers
everytime my cellmate gets on Twitter & begs for Raman noodles.
@RickWrightNow @mbrady505 None of the above. You can't legalize or outlaw people's feelings & thoughts. If we could, no one would be in jail.
2017 = 47,173 recorded suicides.
These shooters want to commit suicide.